John Rosemond is my Hero!
Filed under: Home Organization, Household Chores & Cleaning, Organize My Kids
When I began writing my book, Mom, Can I Help Around the House? I consulted the expertise of many highly regarded child development experts. One of my favorites is John Rosemond. When my oldest was about 3 years old (she’s now 14), I was fortunate to have had the opportunity to attend a presentation of his at my church and found his traditional philosophies about raising children to be identical to my own. I have read several of his books as well. This week I happened upon an article by John Rosemond that I had to include on my blog. His no-nonsense approach just tells it like it is, and I believe today’s parents need reminders like this to bring them back to reality of what our role is of a parent. This is what my book and chore system is all about, but I could never say it as eloquently as John Rosemond has in the following article.
Teach children the skills they need to be independent
The purpose of raising a child is to get him or her out of your life and into a life of his/her own.
1. Put yourself at the center of your child’s attention, not the other way around. It is a simple matter to discipline a child who is paying attention to you and nigh-unto impossible to discipline a child who is not.
In that regard, always keep in mind that the more attention you pay a child, the less attention the child will pay to you.
2. Put your child into a meaningful role in your family, one that is defined in terms of responsibilities known as chores (remember them?). By the time your child is 4 years old, he should be contributing significant time and effort on a daily basis to the maintenance of the household.Your child’s chores should not be assigned haphazardly, but should be established as a routine.
In addition to picking up after himself and keeping his own living space clean and orderly, he should be working in “common areas” of the home, doing such things as dusting and vacuuming.
You do tell people that your child is gifted, do you not?
Without chores, a child is a mere consumer, on a perpetual entitlement program, and entitlements do not strengthen people or culture. Grow a strong child.
3. Keep television and other electronic media out of your child’s life until your child has learned to read well and is self-entertaining.The research is clear that electronic media shortens attention span, interferes with the development of certain critical thinking skills and develops a dependency that leads to frequent complaints of boredom.
Remember that an average of just two hours of “screen time” a day means your child is absorbing electronic stimulation to the tune of 730 hours a year. That’s the equivalent of eighteen 40-hour work weeks.
Think of the creativity that’s being lost. Grow a child with a strong brain.
4. From day one, keep clutter out of your child’s life by keeping toys and other “stuff” at a minimum.
Paradoxically, children who entertain themselves well (low-maintenance children) tend to have few toys. These children are also more grateful for and take better care of what they have. Grow an imaginative, creative child.
5. Emphasize manners, not skills.
Sixty years ago, most children came to overcrowded first grades not knowing their ABCs, yet at the end of the year were reading at a higher level than today’s kids, most of whom are already reading in kindergarten.
That happened because parents of 60 years ago taught proper behavior, not skills; therefore, teachers taught skills, not proper behavior. Grow a polite child.
6. Love your child enough to grow a happy child.
Family psychologist John Rosemond answers parents’ questions on his Web site at www.rosemond.com.
As I write this, my girls are happily doing their chores. To receive the first chapter of my book Mom, Can I Help Around the House? , visit www.KidsandChores.net.
Originally posted 2008-12-13 19:28:33. Republished by Blog Post Promoter
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